an update

not much has been happening. i've been to two funerals in the last week. i went to the NZEI annual meeting and it was interesting. the auckland people are stroppy and the president shut them down...it was great. and i'm off to singapore on the morrow. i'm currently in thermals cos it's cold and wet...deja vu for LA last year. i went from 12 C to 38 C. at least this year i'll be prepared. and i hate heat. i am looking forward to seeing monkeys though.

new words

**another disclaimer...when i wrote this i made links...that all came up error 404...the ubiquitous, non-sensical error, so i'm putting dates( in new zealand standard format of dd/mm/yy) in as a cross reference in case you care to check...i may come back and fix it later..or i may not...**

i hate text (02/07/09) speak (10/03/09)...that's been established...but...i do like words. i have opinions about new words. these are the words i like...aks, biggin (as in to make bigger), smallen (as in to make smaller), chillax, brung (the past tense of brought), shat (the past tense of shit).

these are the words/phrases i hate...bate (as in last week the all blacks bate the wallabies 33-6), versing, gotta (in the context of do you gotta...translation is...do you have a...).

i may add to either or both lists as the words spring to mind.
laters (another i like).

and an update...the whole duty roster is being re-vamped...due to this (11/08/09)...oh the power. but...yesterday i missed a meeting and it was a huge anti-me bitch fest. the chick i sent in my stead backed me up...yay...but...i still hate my job. love the kids...hate the work site. however. one of my colleagues left last year for bigger and better things at another school. he's back next year. tail between his legs. well...slightly not legal as the job hasn't been advertised and he had an informal interview just recently. i like it cos the boss wrote him off and i trained him as a leader and recognised it and backed him up...

yes, it's racist, but shhh...don't tell them

i was at a meeting today. i chose to sit at a table with someone i knew. she is a kaiarahi te reo and is fluent. as were all her mates (and one was hot btw...very very tasty). she and her mates decided to korero maori despite there being two of us whiteys at the table. i know a bit of the lingo so kept up with the general gist of the convo. but. i found it a bit rude. but one must not say it cos one may be considered racist... puh-lease...

nana's a pot-head

i'm thinking that medicinal marijuana should be decriminalised. as a scientist i know it has pain relieving qualities and it relieves the symptoms of glaucoma. why am i mentioning this? some doris got busted for growing marijuana in her back yard. she's 70. she's no threat. or is she? she's been given home detention for a year plus 300 hours community service. she's also merited a whole 15 minutes of fame on 60 minutes.

and why am i discussing this? cos we discuss current events and it was brought up. and then extrapolated (big word alert) on in an interesting way. one of my boys said his step dad got 8 months inside for growing cannabis. and he has stated that his future career plans involve smoking cannabis. i had to explain to him that maybe jail wasn't an ideal place for the pot-smoking nana. i find his sense of justice really interesting cos this guy is going to prison...sad but true. and it may be the first time he has ever expressed empathy and understanding for someone other than himself. i'm taking the credit for that. but despite my best efforts this guy will not complete his secondary education (in fact if he completes more than four weeks of year 9/third form i will eat my hat) and he will go to jail. i just hope he doesn't kill someone.

sad but true.

farts are funny

**warning...this blog entry contains references to bodily functions**

today at church we were all lining up for communion and someone dropped one. i had to bite my lips and stare at the floor cos otherwise i would've just pissed myself with laughter. and i wasn't the only one. it was a loud and proud and didn't smell (which is a pity). smelly ones are great. except when you have a nose that doesn't function properly and you can't smell them. i feel sorry for those who are blessed with an awesome fart generator and can't completely appreciate their heady vintage cos their snorer doesn't work correctly.

i have a phantom farter. well, we think we know who it is. and every time someone drops a silent but deadly we blame him.

i had another one a few years ago who used to eat eggs to deliberately drop the smelliest, foulest bombs imaginable. it got to a point where i had to ring his father and give him numerous detentions before he realised that it was only funny the first half a dozen times and after that it was just rude.

i also really like billy connolly's fart sketch where he describes what it would be like if they were coloured. pissed myself laughing there.

take the golden an...

i knew i'd come back to this...there is a huge furore at the moment about putting the h back into a city that never had one in the first place. and last night on the radio some dude rang up and said "take the golden H and put it in the tan van and give it to stan..." i knew what he was talking about but karyn and andrew thought he was on drugs. it was very clever. and also a great sesame st sketch. i can't find the words. if you remember it, or can tell me the words...i'd like to know.
and go tattoo stu...
oh..and futher to my entry on the 9th...what is it with preteen boys and their testicles? another boy (a mate of the last one) got an elbow in the nuts today. mind you, he was aksing for it. then, after knowing how much pain it caused him, he elbowed the protagonist in the same area!..personally i never felt a thing, as i said to them all, but why?...comments please.

i can't believe i'm a gym bunny

it's very hard to believe. but i have noticed some changes. no more trainee cankles. my fadoobedahs are firmer (damn you triceps pressups, i hate you). there are three gaps in the leg area. there are bits that now go in that didn't before (and while i don't get those bits out in public, i'm not the only one to have seen them)...there's your reference.

i have an idea for a referendum

bad hair cuts by parents should be punishable by jail time...unless they have been recommended by the teacher.

one of my girls was given a bad haircut the other day...it's terrible.

but on the flip side, i have a student who has had kutus for the last year and a half...her hair moves on its own. i told her today she needs to shave her head. she can't come back to school til she's done it. cruel but seriously...nits for that long? apparently she gets treated all the time but it's not working. her hair is solid eggs. on the flip side...she's managed to keep them to herself cos as far as i know no one has caught them from her. i think it's something that is generally known but not acknowledged and therefore avoided.

on another note...one of my boys got a tennis ball in the nuts today. he hit the deck. i pissed myself laughing. he told the boy that did it he had to go to the bathroom to check everything was still there...and if it wasn't, he was coming to get him.

and to cap off an eventful day...another got a three day stand down (well that is the rumour)...we don't get told these things. i sent him to the principal's office and he never came back. rumour has it he got three days. i'll just put a question mark on the electronic register if he's absent tomorrow. i'm not gonna aks. i'm gonna wait til i'm told, ie never.

next thing. some dickhead gave me a parking ticket tonight when i was in a vestry meeting. i have a parking permit. gave the ticket to the vicar and he'll sort it. still have a perfect record.